Ready to relate?
Are you sure you really want a relationship? Perhaps you’re actually quite content with being single but have difficulty admitting it. Lots of people give in to social pressures to find a partner when it may be the wrong time for them or simply not what they fundamentally want. Although the need for an intimate bond is deeply embedded in all of us, we can be very content for significant periods of time with the company of close friends and a stimulating career.
However, being single still involves relating – whether to casual lovers or best friends. If the answer to ‘Are you sure you want a relationship?’ is an unqualified ‘Yes!’, you still need to take a moment to reflect on whether you feel ready to take on the responsibility for such a big leap in your life right now.
If you do feel ready, remember that just waiting around won’t make anything happen; you will only make this leap by tackling things differently and by taking charge of your future. If you yearn for action, don’t give any ground to inertia or procrastination. If you want things to stay the same, then well and good; if you don’t, then look at how your initiatives today can be the catalyst for a new and more exciting life tomorrow.
A good starting point is to understand much more clearly what you want from a relationship. Try the following checklist:
|How do you see your ideal relationship? If you could wave a magic wand, would it be:|
|« An intimate togetherness with marriage/cohabitation?|||
|« A part-time but committed lover?|||
|« Together but independent?|||
|« Friend and lover?|||
|« Together and sharing the joys of children?|||
|Other preferences:Note them down.|
Today, unlike in times gone by, there are many models of happy relationships to consider. But remember, whatever transpires in real life will never be exactly what you anticipate; adjustments and compromises are nearly always necessary. Nevertheless, having a model of what you’d ideally like is important for keeping you motivated. Being aware of what is blocking the realization of this ideal will take away the power of that block and enable you to start being proactive.
To contact Drawing Down the Moon, call 020 7224 1001 between 1030am and 11pm 7 days a week!