The phrase ‘pickup artist’ probably wasn’t in most people’s vocabularies until the recent successful campaign to prevent the controversial Julien Blanc from entering the UK.
The pickup artist tag we can cope with – while you might not agree with his well-documented (allegedly sexually abusive) methods, at least there is little room for doubt about the aim of those methods. The end game is to get your date into bed.
One of the many worrying things about this for us as dating professionals is that Blanc’s Wikipedia page also describes him as a dating coach. Let’s be clear: the type of ‘date coaching’ promoted by Blanc could not be further from what we call date coaching.
Blanc’s brand of coaching relies upon identifying and playing upon weaknesses or anxieties that your date may have. Indeed, Blanc has previously uploaded a chart detailing the spectrum of physical and sexual abuse and captioned it: “May as well be a checklist… #HowToMakeHerStay.”
DDM date coaching
The kind of date coaching we offer is not about tricking or humiliating your date but presenting the best version of yourself to them. When you come along for a coaching session with Drawing Down the Moon, we’re not encouraging you to exploit frailties in the person you’re meeting, but helping you to understand the weaknesses in the image you’re portraying to them.
There is nothing underhand about this. Instead, we want to help you ensure that what you wear, how you look, your body language and what you say is all geared towards creating the best possible first impression. Again, this is not to create a false idea of who you are, but to iron out the habits we all have that can put people off before they have had a chance to meet the real us.
The end game of our date coaching is securing a second date; giving you and your date the best possible chance to meet each other again, get to know each other better and find out if there is a realistic chance of building a relationship together.
More often than not, this is down to confidence. It appears confidence is also key to Blanc’s method although, in his case, it seems to be about undermining other people’s confidence.
His own website claims that his coaching will, “Make Girls BEG To Sleep With You After SHORT-CIRCUITING Their Emotional And Logical Mind Into A Million Reasons Why They Should…”
At DDM date coaching sessions, there is no short-circuiting and no bamboozling of anybody’s “emotional and logical mind”. Getting coached by us is about improving your own personal confidence because when you feel and act confidently, you usually show yourself in the best possible light. In other words, you show people the version of you that people get to see if they are your friends or you feel relaxed in their company. Something closer to the real you than the nervous version that might otherwise turn up on first dates.
Find out more about DDM’s brand of date coaching.
If you are ready to meet someone special, contact the friendly award winning matchmakers at Drawing Down the Moon Matchmaking.
